12.20.2006

Koonj asks, “But, are you happy?”

Honestly, I’m so scared that maybe this is a nightmare and I’m not having a healthy pregnancy. I mean I read all these sites about what to expect at week 6, which by the way is confusing in itself knowing that conception occurred 4 weeks ago either on the 21 or the 23rd. So anyway, I am supposed to be feeling soreness in my breasts, which I don’t. I’m supposed to be nauseous and experiencing morning sickness, which I have not. I am supopsed to smell awful scents, which I did for one day.

They warn that a loss of pregnancy symptoms may mean a blighted ovum. I mean I did feel very, very sore in the beginning. Honestly, now all I feel is tired and gaseous. But, I took another pregnancy test this morning it came up positive (that’s three folks). I just wanna puke, or feel like I gotta puke, that’s all!

I wish I could have had a Dr. confirm all of this especially BEFORE I trek to homeland to tell my Mom, brother and close friends.

I pray Insh’Allah all is well. I thank Allah for the pregnancy. I can’t wait till my first appointment January 8th. I hope I don’t get crazier through this pregnancy, because meri choti and miya would suffer, for sure.

HELP, I need some girl thoughts.

12.15.2006

'I'm Not Weird, I'm Eclectic' Meme

Tagged!

1. I have a green lizard in my truck named "Reggie". Reggie has traveled with me for many, many miles since I first started driving at 16. Something about his comapny remindsme of my woman-hood success through my travels from 16 to AHMEM 31; I love driving and feel so independent and free when I do.

2. I used to be the most bland eater in the world. I only ate grilled cheese, chicken noodle soup and cereal for years. Now I eat anything and everything and gawk at bland food. My family thinks DH is an alien and abducted me. Actually cereal remains my favorite food to this day and I will eat a whole box whenever forced to eat alone. Frosted Mini Wheats rock!

3. I have a tattoo from my younger chucks and potatoe sack wearing days. I once had my eyebrow pierced, but had to remove it b/c of an internship at a mental hospital.

4. I once was stupid enough to go on a joy ride which included top speeds of 100 mph and cruising down "Dead Man's Hill" while car was in neutral. We landed at the bottom of the hill after a 360 degree spin and life-flashed before our eyes.

5. I have owned snakes, turtles, cray fish, crickets, cat fish-you name it, whatever one could pull out of the "crick" as pets. One of my nicknames was "Bug"

6. Some people claim that I am fairly intelligent, but I have what my call "_____ (insert my name) moments". This means I totally space out and say stupid things like, "Wow I have never heard of the group called 'P'", when at a record store and mistaking the letter dividers for one of the CD titles ha-ha.

7. I have never baby-sat or otherwise taken care of a child and I plan to be a mother!

8. One of my favorite books is The Jungle and it led to my passion for organizing. My first week on the job after grad school had me in a full-length fuzzy shark suit and a picture of me in said suit was posted in the newspaper. "Look ma, I'm a radical rebel in a shark suit with a master's degree!"

9. I was raised Christian but really have an embarrasingly low-amount of knowledge about the bible and the stories one is supposed to know as a Christian.

10. I spent college spring break on a Habitat for Humanity trip with strangers digging ditches while my friends partied in the Bahamas.

12.14.2006

Say it ain't so

Reasons why I might be pregnant:

*I feel as bloated as an inflatable doll and everything is sore

*I have never-ending gas pains

*Aunt Flow is nine days late

*My stomach growls day and night

*I have very early dates with my bed

*People don’t seem so cute and tolerable these days

*The positive sign appeared on the home test

*The doctor’s office laughed at my request for a test saying, “Honey if you tested positive, you’re pregnant!”

Why do all of these still add up to disbelief? I just don’t believe it, yet!

Thank you, thank you for all of your well wishes and prayers, I think they just might have worked! Alhamdallilah!

12.12.2006

Better Than Flowers...

Hubby came home with Folic Acid!



**B/c it's way too early to tell anyone else and I'm totally not convinced...To my blogger frineds: I am five days late and just tested positive on a home test.

12.05.2006

Phenomenal Woman

Wow, time flies and I’m not exactly sure I have anything to account for the time lost. Thanksgiving was warm and relaxing, as it should be. DH’s cousins came and we had desi-Euro style tikka turkey, aloo zera, green bean casserole and chocolate pecan pie. It was quite nice to have four days off in a row and their great company made it easier for me to keep myself away from work. DH and his cousin number one who is exactly his age had a falling out. These animated display of emotions always surprise and scare me at the same time. I grew up in a “stuff it and talk about others” type of environment, so you can imagine my anxiety during those times. He left on pretty sour terms, Insh’Allah, they will see past these differences.

Can I hear an Allalejiah for beautiful women? I have recently been graced with by the positive energy of some very wonderful ladies. I attended a diversity training led by a phenomenal, educated, talented facilitator who is the first African American president of the American Psychological Association. She was both courageous and soft-hearted at the same time.

Then I attended a fundraiser for a women’s organization which was hosted by a local chapter of Zonta, a group of philanthropically-minded professional women. The group adopts an organization that has women’s issues in their mission and vision for a period of two years and fundraises, markets and volunteers for the group. Over 300 women attended for this brunch buffet and thousands of dollars were raised in the name of single moms in need of assistance-Alhamdalilah!

I continue to attend my weekly Alanon meeting. This group is not segregated and occasionally a man will come, but it is mostly sisters that join me in our shared journey to recovery from the trauma we experience in loving alcoholic parents, brothers, husbands and children.

I joined a book club and expected that the women might be bored SAHMs. I was proven wrong and humbled by the power of a discussion group which includes a chemist, shop teacher and web designer.

Furthermore, I am proud to be able to “voice” my support to a few of my virtual friends in the Brass Crescent Awards. My votes went to Baraka at Truth and Beauty (thank you for the knock on my door by the way), Shabana at Koonj and my new favorite, the talented Maliha at Lightness of Being (Aisha, I wished for the opportunity to vote for you, too!).

Each of you are phenomenal and we each make the world a more beautiful place. Next time you look in the mirror, revel in your inner and outer beauty as a WOMAN. May you enjoy the power of Maya’s Phenomenal Woman…

PHENOMENAL WOMAN
by Maya Angelou
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a model's fashion size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
I say
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips
The stride of my steps
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.
I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please
And to a man
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees
Then they swarm around me
A hive of honey bees.
I say
It's the fire in my eyes
And the flash of my teeth
The swing of my waist
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.
Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say
It's in the arch of my back
The sun of my smile
The ride of my breasts
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.
Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say
It's in the click of my heels
The bend of my hair
The palm of my hand
The need for my care.
'Cause
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.