MIL Round III, Chapter 1

Oh I don’t want to complain, but I feel my blood pressure rising. I just might explode if I don’t release the pressure valve. Oh yeah, that’s why I have a blog…

Let me preface by saying that I love my MIL dearly. My MIL and FIL have provided me so much love, consideration, benefit-of-the-doubt and many, many gifts. But, at the end-of-the-day, I must declare the honeymoon over and bemoan the in-law blues.

I am still in shock over the length of time my MIL will be staying. I mean, oops, no one informed me nor my hubby and surprise, you have an in-house visitor for 4.5 months! Yep, you heard me right-1/3 of my year. I am very hurt for a lot of reasons. I am upset about the presumptuous notion that we had nothing else scheduled for our first summer here in this new state. Or better, yet, the presumption that all our activities would/should be scheduled with MIL in tow and revolve around my hubby’s family and friends.

Already, I am struggling with the fact that I have moved far from my family and friends and that I know no one here. Now, I have “lost” my hubby to his mama and all my future social activities involve his friends and family.

What about our plans to take weekend drives and find new camping sites? What about the long line of “our” friends and my family that wanted to visit this summer. I mean ¼ of a year especially given the fact that we live in an arctic region is a big commitment. I feel that her visits always drive a wedge between me and my/our friends and family because they are not part of the “exclusive” tight knit-hand-stamped Pakistani circle. I fear alienation and loneliness. I fear that I continue to lose my identity little by little.

Maybe our long-awaited honeymoon in Venice from two weeks ago was really the end of the "me and hubby" era. I mean let’s tell the truth, she was sent for such a long period of time for many, many reasons, which I’m sure we’ll discuss over the months. But, the number one agenda item is to set me up for pregnancy. I’m sad, excited, curious, scared.

My life is truly all about family at this point. Once you have children, you truly cross over from “friends in love who happen to be married” to parents and providers of the grandchildren, nephews and nieces, etc. Removed from my family and friends and being in a strange place, these thoughts are intimidating and doubtful.

Sigh.